Fifty five days to go til my marathon!
Now is not the time to flounder on training runs and cross training, but that is what I seem to have been doing. Let me ‘splain…
Two weeks ago, something really important trumped my training runs for 3 days, then I was out of town and forgot my contact lenses, then it was raining. Blah, blah, blah. You get the picture, though. I haven’t really had a good reason to NOT be doing what I KNOW I should have been doing.
I missed a long run. Let that sink in. I missed a 17 mile run.
I ate ALL last weekend in Louisville, Kentucky: went to a “Hog and Barrel Dinner’, ate delicious pancakes, snacks, miscellaneous pastries, football game food, ‘adult beverages’. It was a setback in eating and training. I had a wonderful time, though. I shall remind myself of this when the guilt starts to seep back into my head.
So, last week, I did a bit better. I only missed my Sunday track run. It was 10-11 miles of timed runs. Not good, but I did do everything else as scheduled. My long run on Friday was 15 miles. I ran 15.38 and felt pretty okay. I started getting a little achy in the hip and one knee around 11 but it kind of worked it’s way out by 14. I felt fine afterward. Friday was a busy day, so I really didn’t have any rest to speak of until very late in the evening. I was a little worried that I’d feel stiff on Saturday morning, but I didn’t. Yay! That has to count for something, right?
I have had this uneasy feeling for about 3 weeks. I am starting to doubt. Yes, I know. There’s no place for doubt in marathon training – or any other kind of training, I guess. I feel it, though. On the one hand, I tell myself that if all else fails, I can surely WALK when I can’t run and will still be able to have some fun and finish on time. The whole point of this second marathon was to enjoy it. On the other hand, I feel like I am not fully prepared. I doubted the training program at first, but now it is more my own personal resolve that I doubt.
So, which is it? Am I feeling the doubt that Shakespeare allegedly wrote about “doubt is called the beacon of the wise” or that of Khalil Gibran: “doubt is a pain too lonely to know that faith is his twin brother” ?
What is the point of all of this? I don’t know, but I am trying to not let my feelings of doubt sink to despair. It’ll all be over then. I wouldn’t mind a little certainty, even if it is absurd. 😉
Until next time.